I’ve been in the financial services industry for almost ten years. And in that time, I’ve had the honor of helping hundreds of people through one of life’s most consequential decisions: retirement.
Every time I’ve had that conversation, the same questions arise.
“Can I afford this?”
“What if the market drops?”
“Do I need to change my lifestyle?”
And every time we have these questions, I always think to myself, I would be asking those very same things. You work your whole life, diligently saving, hoping one day to reach this mythical concept of “retirement.” No more answering to a boss, or dealing with difficult people, or having to go on that work trip at the expense of being able to do something more important to you. You’ve finally reached that stage of life where you have all the time in the world to do … what exactly? And that is where the real conversations start. We spend so much time focusing on the dollars and cents of retirement, we can lose sight of what you may be giving up in exchange for that lifelong independence.
Separating Yourself from Work
Of course, we are more than our career. But for a lot of people, that daily routine can provide a sense of community, purpose, and helps shape our identities. And after we pull that rip cord and strut out of “Corporate America” forever, a lot of people start grappling with a very different set of questions:
“What am I doing to contribute to the world around me?”
“I have so much time now. How am I going to fill it?”
“What the heck do I do now?”
These are the kinds of questions that should be brought up before you make that critical decision. From my experience, the most successful retirees discuss what they are stepping into just as much as what they are stepping away from.
My most personal example comes from working with my own mom, Marian. She spent decades working as a Program Assistant in the Special Ed Department of a Chicagoland school district. Eventually, the time had come to move into the next phase of life. My dad (her husband), Jim, had already embraced retirement, preparing himself well before his last day on payroll. He took up refereeing youth basketball games, worked at the local golf course (mostly for the free golf), and involved himself in volunteer groups.
However, Marian’s identity and community were shaped by her career. By her own admission, it provided her a reason to get up every morning. And even though she had seen her husband successfully transition into this next stage of life, the unknown of life beyond work was intimidating. What brought joy to my mom was being of service to the people around her and being of use to her community. She was someone students and their families relied on, and she had a front row seat to the growth of her students every day. I personally witnessed the joy she brought to her students. The question soon became, how might she replicate that in retirement?
Finding What Brings You Joy
We started framing the discussion around the source of her joy. She still felt she had a lot to give to the world, but she wanted more flexibility in how she spends her time. For example: she didn’t want to take vacation only during spring break and she wanted to see her grandkids more than just after work hours or on weekends. After we identified her reason to retire beyond simply “retiring when everyone else her age retires,” we focused on what she could do to fill her time to bring her joy.
We looked at various programs around the Chicagoland area. There were opportunities in her local church, at nonprofits, and education and tutoring centers. After some trial and error, she found her purpose again through a program at her local church. More importantly though, she could intentionally spend her time with her family.
There are many reasons for one to retire. Sometimes it’s not our decision while for others, it is. But the best time to have those conversations is before that last check comes in. Remember: retirement is about more than just the dollars; it’s about retiring into something meaningful that provides you purpose and joy.
